Searching...

I have always loved children...

love talking to them...playing with them...listening to them tell stories...

or just sitting back and watching them learn...

I am not very creative...or always know what to do...

which gets me frustrated...

because I want so desperately to fill my life with helping children that need it...

I've looked into Fostering...

but, my husband (the realistic one)...

is just not totally on board...(I can't say I blame him)...

he reminds me of all the things that I don't see when on a mission...

money...time...me getting upset...or totally consumed and stressed out...

the effects it might have on Ethan...him...me...

He knows I want to "Save the World" (his words)...

but, I sometimes don't think things through...and then I realize it is not exactly what I wanted...

or needed...or am able to fulfill...

I am always in search of "my fit"...

what am I "meant to do" with my life...

I went back to school for my Early Elementary Ed degree...

and ended up hitting a couple roadblocks...

I waited it out to see if they were bumps...or a stop sign...

I realized recently that it is a stop sign...

So...what next?

I am looking for a sign...a reason...something to hit me and say...

THIS is what you are supposed to do...

I recently found something called CASA...

which stands for Court Appointed Special Advocates.

You are basically a volunteer for children...

Exactly what does a CASA volunteer do?

CASA volunteers are appointed by judges to advocate for the best interests of abused and neglected children in court and other settings. The primary responsibilities of a CASA volunteer are to:

Gather information: Review documents and records, interview the children, family members and professionals in their lives.

Document findings: Provide written reports at court hearings.

Appear in court: Advocate for the child's best interests and provide testimony when necessary.

Explain what is going on: Help the child understand the court proceedings.

"Be the glue": Seek cooperative solutions among individuals and organizations involved in the children's lives. As one volunteer said: Be the glue that connects the pieces in a complicated child welfare system.

Recommend services: Ensure that the children and their family are receiving appropriate services and advocate for those that are not immediately available. Bring concerns about the child's health, education, mental health, etc. to the appropriate professionals.

Monitor case plans and court orders: Check to see that plans are being followed and mandated review hearings are being held.

Keep the court informed: Update the court on developments with agencies and family members. Ensure that appropriate motions are filed on behalf of the child so the court knows about any changes in the child's situation.

http://www.casaforchildren.org/site/c.mtJSJ7MPIsE/b.5301295/k.BE9A/Home.htm

I don't know...do I have the time...the energy...the knowledge...the heart...

I will keep searching...and waiting...and looking...

meanwhile...I just might have to look into this...

Not Just For Weddings...

                                                                                 *Loving*
                                                                                 BHLDN!!!!
                                       While mainly a beautiful, vintagey, organic online wedding store...
                                                      it has many many treasures for your home!

                                                         These are some of the pieces I adore!!!

                                         {for on my buffet filled with white M&M's!!!  How fresh!}

                     {Again, on my buffet...this fantastic slate piece for writing life's little pleasures upon!}

                                    {How fabulous are these straws!!! They come in every color!! 
                      PERFECT for a kids party or an outdoor soiree sipping lemonade under the sun!!}

                 {Ordered myself some of these beautiful pompon's to hang from my dining room ceiling...
                       or on dinner plate for a Summer Beach table...on the beds in the kiddies rooms...
                                                the options are ENDLESS for these cuties!!!}

                                         {Pretty, fresh fans for your guests at an outdoor garden party...
                                 just pop them in a tall glass jar and have the ladies help themselves! 
                                                         Very elegant and old fashioned!!!}
                                                      & they have a bunch of beautiful colors!!!

                   {LOVE these old fashioned keys to just throw on a table for instant conversation!}
                                          Or tie an individual one to a gift for a unique gift tag!

                    {Hang these from tree branches and add a votive candle for beautiful outdoor lighting
                                         at a dinner party...or just cocktails and fun with the family!} 
                                                         Ambiance is KEY in my world!!!

                     {How great is this mushroom style cup/cake stand!  Very earthy and whimsical!}

{ADORE this wide brimmed floppy hat for sitting outside in the Summer...Very feminine...}

                      {String these gorgeous glittered letters together to make ANY saying you want! 
                            Happy Summer!  Warmth!  Welcome!  Fun!  The options are endless!

{I cannot get enough of this fantastic cruet!  Fill with Raspberry Lemonade...Iced Tea...or Sangria...}

Yay Summer!!!

Sometimes you can find the most beautiful and unique items at places you wouldn't think to look!

Check out http://www.bhldn.com/index.cfm!!!!!

Lucky...

I am a really...really... lucky woman...

sometimes I forget that.

I get overwhelmed with what I *want* or what I don't have...

instead of just relishing in what I do have...

I am rich...

but, not in the way that you think...

I share my life with someone who is so giving...

he seems to know what I need...mentally...spiritually...emotionally...

he wraps his arms around me when I am sad...he laughs with me when I am happy...he pinches my fanny when I need an "us" moment...he gives me space when I am overwhelmed...

he is the love of my life...

Sure, we fight...we don't always see eye to eye...we argue about money...or needing some "me" time...

but, mostly we grow together...

side by side...

sometimes without saying much...but, we always know that the other person will be there...

always...

it's something you just sort of feel...

ya know?...

I have a man who really knows me...

& we created this beautiful person together...

and we have such fun!!! 

I am so blessed...

I love you Craig...very much...

Terrain...

If you haven't been formally introduced...

Friends...Terrain...Terrain...Friends...

http://www.shopterrain.com/

It is basically a sister company of Anthro!!

(which is THE BEST store EVER!)

It is soo fresh...

celebrating the beauty of organic pieces...gardening...& earthy loveliness...

*in Love*

Check it out...

You will fall madly in love...

Been gone a while...

Sooo...I have been gone for a while...

I had a lot of things going on in my life...and they all seemed to come crashing down at once...

I just had no drive...no desire to do much...

the only thing that seemed to make me happy was my family and friends...
{& wine...love me some vino!}

Just a little background...

My wonderful, kind, caring, compassionate, patient, handsome husband and I have been trying to have our second child for over 3 years now...with no luck.

Our first came fairly easy...we playfully tried for a few months with no stress...no tracking anything...just said "let's see how it goes..."

and we got preggers within about 7 months.

This time around...not so much...

I must admit, 3 years of tests...poking... prodding...procedures...drugs...shots...doctor visits (all with the outcome of NOTHING IS WRONG WITH ME)...staying positive...staying happy...having hope each and every month...and 6...yes, 6  IUI's can only last so long...

mine...about 3 1/2 years...then, I hit the wall.  Hard. 

I started to think that maybe I was going to give birth to the antichrist...and God was just taking his time with that...
or...that I was going to have a baby that was just not going to be born healthy...and He didn't want me to go through that...
or...my health...or marriage was going to come crumbling down and God didn't want me to have another baby when all this was supposed to happen...

or...maybe...I just can't have anymore.

I have decided to accept the fact that I am meant to have one.

Then...work tanked...yes, I still have a job...but, well...it's a long story...

Next...my little E didn't get into the 2 Kindergartens that I really really really really wanted (& needed) him to go to...

Then, all the online schooling I took wouldn't transfer to any of my local colleges for my Early Elementary Ed degree...so, $18,000.00 and 18 months of my life were just shot down...

YIKES!!!

I was mad...and sad...and a little depressed...

So, my very wonderful friend told me to allow myself to be sad... to cry...to be upset...

and get angry...to yell at God...

but, after that...to pick myself up and put the pieces back together...

& that's where we are now...

picking up the pieces...smiling more...giving thanks for all the good and wonderful things in my life...and trusting in God's plan...

   

Anyway...if you are still reading this...and are not completely depressed...thanks!

Maybe one day...I will have a post that just SQUASHES this one to bits!!!

lovely in lilac...

By far my favorite dress of the evening...

Mila Kunis in Elie Saab...

just lovely... 



Back and relaxed...

We had a BALL up north this past week!

I read an entire book in 3 days!

{Water for Elephants...by Sara Gruen}...

you can really say vacation when you can read a whole book from cover to cover in 3 days!

It was a great book.  I highly recommend it.

We played hockey...made snow angels...went sledding...ice skated...walked the lake...slept in...

ate FABULOUS food...drank a few cocktails...sat in front of a roaring fire...everday...

talked...laughed...played cards...and just enjoyed the fantastic Michigan Winter.

The cousins...{they ADORE each other...we are really lucky}

Ethan...my 4 1/2 year old son...that HAS to be great at EVERYTHING...on his very first try...

cause, of course...we are all great at EVERYTHING when we first try, right? (ha ha)

Needless to say, he gets really upset when he was not a professional hockey player on his first try...

so, here is E...pouting...cause being up north is just not fun...torture really...

we are such bad parents!

(hee hee)

He got over it!

The doggies!  Actually, there are 4 of them and it is complete chaos, but they are in HEAVEN up here!

Craig and Olivia playing dance party {Kung Fu Fighting}!!

 

Ethan and Griffin doing Old MacDonald on Dance Party Wii!

Up North Harlow...all tuckered out...

Until next time...